Tolerance...

Dear Life,


I am not close with my mother.  I'm a super vocal, outgoing, talkative person.  My mother is the exact opposite.  I've always known that my mom has struggled in her life; and she keeps her emotions to herself.  I think she's afraid to be hurt.  I've gone through the gamut of emotions when it comes to my mom; anger, frustration, sadness, aloofness.  I've always wanted to be closer to my mom, but how do you get past the great wall of China?

 via

I've never tried before.  To be truthful, I didn't want to get hurt.  We have been at an impasse for years.  I call my mom to be able to report to my grandma that I called her.  We have the longest half an hour of awkward conversation; weather, animals, house, etc.  

Until last week. 
Last week I felt prompted to ask my mom about her story.  I've come to the conclusion that everyone has a story.  Our personal story makes us who we are...certain events in our story shape us; they are turning points.  They are our forks in the road.  

As I was talking to my mom, I actually had the guts to tell her that I really wanted to know her story.  I told her I wanted to understand her and that would only work if I knew her story.  She told me it wasn't pretty.  I told her I knew that, but I wasn't going to judge her.  I just want to know her, understand her, and have the opportunity to build a relationship with her.  She told me she has never told anyone her story.  Can you imagine?  I am such a blabber mouth, I could never hold any of it in.  (Hence the blog...I tell anyone who wants to listen about my life)  When she told me she wasn't ready, I understood.  It will take a lot for my mom to trust me enough to share her story with me.  I told her I am here when she is ready with no judgement, just an ear.  

I have often thought that the world would be a better place if we all took the time to understand each other; talk to one another; find out each other's stories.  Tolerance....begins with knowledge.  Knowledge begins with sharing....and listening.