Tuesday, December 15, 2015

2nd period

Dear life,

My tall one has made incredible strides.
He has finally started going to school again.
The first day he got out of the car....and then he went right back in.
The next day he took about 15 steps, spoke to the guidance counselor, and then went home.  
The next day, his brother left for his mission and he was so sad.  But he still went to school.
He didn't get out of the car that day. 
But he spoke to his coach and the guidance counselor followed by a visit with his therapist. 
The following two days he spent about 25 minutes each in school.
This may seem like not much to most.
But to a child with his disorders, it was a huge push forward; one that he was unable to make for months.  
We celebrated every minute he pushed himself.
Because we know how very challenging it is just to be in school.
That weekend he set even bigger goals for himself.
He decided to attend algebra class in his coach's class.
Monday he got dressed (and looked quite handsome) and with a little bit of nerves went to class.
And stayed the whole time.
One class isn't much to most.
But to him it was a victory.
And all of last week he spent each 2nd period in Algebra. 
He got more and more comfortable.
He laughed with the other kids.
And then Friday happened.
Friday he had a really bad night.
The voices came back and told him he couldn't do it.
And he became fearful again.
The whole weekend threw him for a loop.
But somehow he pulled it out and went to 2nd period on Monday.
He took a test.
And he did a great job.
But that night, he was unable to practice basketball.
He couldn't shake the voices telling him he can't.
And today all he could do was go in the car and sit in the parking lot.
We call that a small victory.
But his heart is heavy.
He doesn't know how to manage this.
He doesn't want to have to worry that it's going to come back whenever it wants.
But that's the thing.
It will come back.
We don't know when...or why...or how to make it not happen.
We only know that with patience, love, and kindness he will get through.
We have to teach him that there is always tomorrow.
We have to teach him to not give up.
We have to teach him that he has a future.
That he has a lot going for him.
We have to teach him to believe.
To believe in himself.
To believe in others.

I am incredibly proud of my warrior.
And I am so grateful to the people in his life that stand next to him, fighting with him, believing in him, and giving him the strength to go another day.

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