Today I went to a basketball game with my tall one.
As I watched the game with him, my heart broke all over again because IT'S NOT FAIR.
He should be ON the court.
He should be playing.
He should be enjoying his freshman year of high school.
Instead, he is sidelined by this horrible illness....that may or may not get better.
He is on the outside, looking in.
Watching, when I'm sure he's aching to run, jump and shoot that ball.
But he's afraid.
I watched his teammates play, wondering if they knew just how THANKFUL they should be.
Thankful they COULD play.
Thankful they COULD go to school.
Thankful they weren't living a bad dream every day.
Thankful they weren't afraid.
Then I thought of my own children.
I wondered if I am teaching my children to be thankful for all that they CAN do.
The ability to go to school.
The ability to play sports, play with friends, BE KIDS.
The ability to be happy.
Then I thought about me.
About how I get sad.
How I grieve all that my boy is losing.
So I've decided I am going to teach myself.
Teach myself how to be thankful.
Thankful for these amazing, beautiful, different children.
Thankful for the lessons we have learned as a family.
Thankful for the love we have as a family.
Thankful for the gospel that strengthens me.
Thankful for the mess that teaches me.
Thankful for the incredible strength and bond we have formed together while fighting these battles.
Thankful that my son is so courageous, that he is a warrior, and that he is choosing to fight this illness instead of giving up.
Thankful for the people that surround our children with love and support, especially when we are battling the most difficult of battles.
Thankful for a son who is choosing to serve a 2 year mission.
I am choosing to be THANKFUL.