I promise

Dear Life,

I promise to tell the truth.
No matter how hard it is.
No matter how bad it makes me feel.
No matter if it is not the happily ever after.

The truth right now?

I KNOW that we are supposed to adopt Sofi.

The other truth?

It is terrifying.

We are focusing on the steps to adoption...it's a great distraction to the reality of it. 
We are so busy gathering papers, collecting signatures, getting reports, and fundraising we don't have time to be afraid.
Unless it's midnight.
And everyone is asleep.
Right now I am admitting my fear.

I would be lying if I said it wasn't scary.
I'm afraid that she won't know how to handle having someone hug her. (That horrifies me...that she may not want to be hugged...but it could happen)
I'm afraid she'll get sick and die before we get her.
I'm afraid people won't accept her.
I'm afraid Kumaka will be sad.
I'm afraid my boys will resent her.
I'm afraid.

Now that my fears have been written down, I'm going to tell you that our family will not let fear rule our lives.
We will education ourselves, we will pray (a lot), we will talk (a lot), we will love each other (even when we make mistakes), we will recognize fear (and then figure out what we need to do to alleviate that fear), we will be patient (with ourselves and with others), we will forgive  (each other and others), we will love. 

We know that fear is not how God works.  LOVE is.  And although there may be (will be) difficulties, with LOVE, FAITH, PATIENCE, ENDURANCE, FORGIVENESS, and a lot of PRAYER we will be okay.  Because we love Sofi.  
And more importantly, GOD loves Sofi.

I promise to be honest....and to share the good and the bad.  To tell the truth.  
The best part of this story will be even better after passing through the challenges. 

Thank you for your support, love, and kindness.